Day 18: Why I Don't Write

I'm writing this entry as I am enjoying a cup of halo-halo! The definitive Filipino summer delicacy is perfect for this sunny day. It is also a sweet way to usher in ROUND TWO of my 15 Days of Writing True!  

I have learned in design thinking that repeating a process albeit in a different iteration fosters creativity. I chose to repeat my class not because I failed, but because I want to see how this journey can be taken differently. How can I enjoy a trip with another perspective? There is only one way to find out and that is by taking it all over again.  

Here's my fearless Day 1 output! 

I am here at Human Nature for their beauty fair! They have released a bronzer, lip miracle (sunflower oil-infused lip balm) and cheek tint! I have personally tested them and they are perfect for sensitive skin and everyday use. I also adore this brand as they are a social enterprise that provides employment to those who need it most. 

I can't wait to see how Round Two turns out. For now, I need to finish my halo-halo and shop for sustainable makeup. 

Day 17: Everyday Storytelling

Everyday is a potential story! 

I am done with my first writing course, the #15DaysOfWritingTrue. It was bittersweet because when I began the course a fortnight ago, I did not have this blog yet. In fact, I only had my personal Facebook and Instagram pages. However, I realized that it has been my longtime dream to have a blog of my own. I then resolved to make this happen and I decided to use my course assignments as my initial content. 

I did not expect this course to take me to places, so to speak. In fact, I did not expect anything at all. Little did I know that it would be the perfect catalyst in developing my writing voice, my discipline, and even my drive. It also motivated me to join another writing class, the Writing Room.  

The best takeaway that I have from this course is that each day is an opportunity to have a new story. I think that is the main essence of creativity, which is essential in these times of uncertainty and fast-paced technology. What makes us truly human is how we are able to create our own stories and share them to the world. It is up to us if we will allow the tide of the tale to wash us over or if we will take the lead. 

Be brave and take the lead in your own story. You will be surprised with your own abilities and there will definitely be unexpected twists to spice up your adventure!

Day 16: Writing To Live

A lot of people ask me how I balance my full-time job with my blog. I am surprised to get this a lot because many bloggers do this while working. I guess it is the frequency of my posts that makes people wonder how I get things done. I am currently taking a couple of online classes to help me with content and improving my technique. Classes cannot teach discipline though, so it is up to me to develop that. I have learned in a goal-setting course that I have to schedule my plans in order to see them come to fruition. I use my workbook for that class religiously, because if there is one thing that I must believe in, it would be the validity of my goals. Right now, my passion project is my blog. I did not ask help from anyone in IT or the blogger community in setting it up. I bought a domain name and annual subscription for website hosting using my hard-earned money. If there is something that motivates me more than anything, it would be the fact that my savings paid for this blog, so I have to maximize it. I cannot just sit around waiting for inspiration to hit me. I have to hit inspiration until I sit down and write.

I have learned that mindfulness helps in keeping me focused, especially when i am on the lookout for experiences to write about. Rather than just killing time, I make sure to live through each moment. I can turn a simple meal into a blog post or a personal anecdote into a story. I have also learned to write as it happens, and it turns out that I am a pretty efficient one at that.

I have also realized that having a passion project elevates the mundane into an art. Living just for the sake of existing does not equate to a balanced time here on earth. Rather, I prefer to live meaningfully, because if I am not thankful for the experiences I am going through, then life is just a pointless journey to oblivion.

I hope to continue this writing journey to enrich each day that I have. I hope to end each one with a prayer of gratitude and the promise of a new day.

Day 14: Letter to Self

Today, I covered Writing with Poetry in my Writing True class. I was tasked to come up with examples for different figures of speech, as well as accomplish a couple of sentence reversal exercises.

My Own Examples of Figures of Speech

SIMILE
I rode the MRT this morning and we were packed like sardines inside the train.

METAPHOR
My breakfast is my arsenal.

HYPERBOLE
I have an eternity to love you.

IRONY
I failed Calculus but I worked in Finance.

ALLITERATION
Piping hot pour-over. Random run. Horrendous heat.

PERSONFICATION
My notebook is insisting that I write. The cardio punched my gut.

OXYMORON
I workout to relax. I work to enjoy my time.

ZEUGMA
I ate my breakfast and my hesitations.

METONYMY
"Insurance policy" for my college degree
"Compass" for inspiration

SYNECHDOCHE
"Blog" for a website. "Minds" for thinking employees.

ANAPHORA
I wrote my blog entry. I wrote my day. I wrote my present. I wrote my future.

EPIPHORA
I will never quit my job. I enjoy my job. I will fight for my job.

ANTITHESIS
School is theoretical, work is the real world.
Many can dance, but few can endure.

CHIASMUS
Never let your worries burden you or your burden worry you.

Converting straightforward sentences into poetic ones.
1) I FELL IN LOVE AND BROKE MY HEART.
I woke my sleeping heart with coffee and poured chamomile over it afterwards.
2) I'M TIRED AND HUNGRY.
I am wiped out and as famished as an uncharged smartphone
3) MY PHONE IS MISSING.
My phone dissolved into thin air.
4) BUY THIS HOUSE.
Conquer this house and establish your kingdom.

Converting poetic sentences into straightforward ones.
1) I AM NOT YOURS, NOT LOST IN YOU. NOT LOST, ALTHOUGH I LONG TO BE.
We are not together, but I want to fall in love with you.
2) SO YES, I WILL GLADLY TAKE ON YOUR OCEAN JUST TO SWIM BENEATH YOU.
I would like to be with you even if I have to be the one to adjust to you. 
3)WANT IS TEN THOUSAND BLUE FEATHERS FALLING ALL AROUND ME, AND ME UNABLE TO STOMACH THAT I MIGHT CATCH FIVE
BUT NEVER TEN THOUSAND.
I want many things but I can only have half of those in reality.

 Final Task: Letter to Myself

(Written yesterday, May 15, 2017) 

Dear Sam, 

I am proud of how you worked out this morning, starting with your ab routine, then a HIIT workout, and finishing off with three rounds of moves for your glutes and thighs. I was thrilled when you told that rude man in the MRT to stop occupying your space because he has more than enough already for himself. You practically told that man to stop grabbing your handrail and stop leaning on you. No one in the MRT had the guts to do that in your section and I could tell that everyone was watching you. You did not let this stop you, and you continued telling the man to move until he did. Well done also for the way you pushed that man when he tried blocking your way as you exited the train. He tried one cheap move, but you responded with a silent clapback. I am pleased with how you stood your ground this morning and how you kept your composure in the office. I am proud of your poise even when you felt like hunching. You did well, and you were a class act. Not to mention that you can walk in high heels now and you even own the aisle with your strut. 

I hope that you will never lose your swagger while keeping your feet planted firmly on the ground. I hope that you will continue working out so you can sculpt your abs while eliminating the need for the second cup of coffee due to all those calories burned. I'm excited to see how your sassy comebacks will move you forward. Never let go of your grace, but always be sharp with your wit. You got this, Lucas. The Force is strong in you. 

Love,

Sam

Day 13: Finally, Speakoutsam

Task for Writing Room: Introducing Myself

My name is Sam, and I was born on the 13th of August. I am 30 years old now, but I feel a lot younger than my years. I started blogging again after attending a goal-setting workshop. I realized that writing is my lifelong love, and my passion project is to have my own website. I rediscovered my voice through the #15DaysofWritingTrue and Writing Room classes. I also have my own 100 Days Project, which is my personal commitment to publish a blog entry everyday for 100 days. Of course, I want to continue my writing journey beyond that time frame.

I want my blog to showcase my advocacy, which is social entrepreneurship. I am also passionate about mindful living, and I am dedicated to enjoying food, books, and experiences more than material things.

I am currently a Program Officer in a university in Manila. I am an only child, and in a serious relationship with my best friend from college. I am addicted to The Beatles, classical music, and coffee.

Finally, it's time to speakoutsam!

Day 12: Writing Efficiently

Once again, my Writing Room class has taken me out of my comfort zone. Writing efficiently is easier said than done for me, since I love being detailed to a fault.  Here are the shortened versions of my mini stories on feelings. They have been scaled down to ten words or less. 

He hugged me longer than usual and held my hand.

I kissed him goodbye, then I alighted the bus.

They sipped lattes as their parents worked in cramped cubicles.

A vial of blood could make or break my summer.

The MRT had insufficient trains for the rush of humanity.

In closing, I was also assigned to edit my first entry for this class and rewrite it in a concise manner.

WRITING IS MY HOME

Writing never felt like a chore to me because I have befriended words early on in my life. I learned how to read at the age of two and this led to a lifelong love for reading. I eventually developed a love for writing, and I contributed for our school paper and occasionally, for
national broadsheets. I also became a public speaker.

Blogging became a natural hobby as I became a habitual writer in university. I have recently started blogging again after joining The 15 Days of Writing True e-course and beginning my 100 Days Project, which integrates my output for another class I am taking, the Writing Room.

Day 11: Feels

My Writing Room classes continue to challenge me by assigning a one-line story for each of the five emotions: joy, sadness, disgust, fear, and anger.

I chose personal topics for my mini stories. For joy, I am talking about the second time I had coffee with my now-boyfriend Allan. For sadness, I wrote about a bus ride we have shared before. I then speak about students who waste their parents' hard-earned money in disgust. For fear, I describe my state of being before each check-up with my endocrinologist (I have hypothyroidism). Lastly, I describe my daily ordeal at the MRT for anger.

In closing, I was asked to write about the last time I felt sad...

Longing for Ella

Hear me roar! Errr, yawwwwn!

There are many dogs in Barkin' Blends, my favorite dog cafe. I can only have one favorite, and Ella will always have a special place in my heart. She is a black chiweenie, a curious mix between a dachshund and a chihuahua. I fell in love with this girl because 1) she is small enough to sit comfortably on my lap, 2) she lets me read and sip on my milk tea as she takes a nap, 3) she lickes me a lot and chooses me among the other humans, and 4) she's sweet and always recognizes me whenever I visit.

I am only allowed to stay in the cafe for a couple of hours at a time, and every time I have to conclude my session there, it is always difficult to say goodbye to Ella. I cling to her sleeping, furry body until it's time to go. I wake her up, kiss her head and tell her that I will be back soon. I then hand her back to the staff and go home to my family, who are all allergic to dogs.

I will just have to visit Ella again.

Day 10: Writing with the Senses

Writing one-line stories has been more challenging than I thought! I have chosen COFFEE as my anchor to describe all five senses.

SIGHT

SMELL

HEARING

TOUCH

TASTE

WRITING MY PERCEPTIONS

I have learned in school that senses allow me to perceive reality. Yet sometimes, my senses fail me. There are external factors which could affect their ability to process life as I know it. Memory is known to be fallible. Emotions can influence one's productivity, if writing is going to be discussed in the realm of work. It is undeniable that writing entails effort, but practicing it habitually has allowed me to view it as a form of therapy rather than a burden.

I have learned to use my imagination to supplement whatever my memory and emotions fall short on. This was particularly helpful when I wrote one-line stories for each of the five senses. I look forward to balancing imaginative writing with documenting life as it actually happens in order to paint a picture with words and a lot of heart.

Day 9: The Way We Met

Us in 2006.

Allan was my classmate in a Manila university. We were both active in class discussions and became fast friends in our public speaking organization. We were drawn to each other's sarcasm, and we both found refuge in each other's wit. I discovered more about his personal life, such as the fact that he was a scholar and he was helping support his family. I admired his kindness and determination even if the world could be cruel and relentless. 

We started hanging out over coffee and I loved talking to him because he did not judge. He had an opinion on almost anything under the sun. We enjoyed cheap barbecue and beer after class. Unfortunately, I was in the wrong relationships then so he became a sounding board more than a love interest. He has signified his intention to be with me in 2005, but I turned him down for someone else. He did the same thing in 2006 and this time, I was already single. We did date around Christmas time but our time together ended after the New Year. We had a petty fight with him shouting at me to "grow up." I just could not handle that so I walked out of his life.

Us today!

We lost touch during the remaining years of college. We eventually talked again in 2010. We were already working by then and he was drunk-calling me every now and then. I found out that he got my number from a mass message I sent to everyone after I got a new phone. As much as I was bothered that he only talked to me whenever he partied and got wasted, I appreciated the fact that I was still his top of mind person to call. I felt sad that he could not hold down any relationship, and I really wished that he would find the right person.

Little did I know that we will cross paths again in 2016. We had coffee after an art fair and we were both single. As adults, we both find our past amusing. Our coffee date was followed-up by more dates, until we became a couple. We are still together until now. I am thankful that we never thought ill of each other. And yes, I did grow up, and I finally chose him.

Day 8: Setting Expectations

Writing has never been a chore for me. I have learned to befriend words early on in my life. You see, my mom has encouraged me to read and write by lulling me to sleep with bedtime stories and has never raised me with baby talk. I was fortunate to have learned how to read at the tender age of two. I was also writing by then, beginning with my name and eventually moving on to editing the endings of my favorite Golden Books. I was reading paperbacks by the time I was in first grade and I have also kept a journal all throughout my growing-up years. It never has felt uncomfortable expressing myself and channeling all of my feelings to a piece of paper. My right ring finger and pinkie are both calloused from too much writing. You see, I can never write gently. Whether I was undergoing childhood milestones or everyday routine tasks, writing all about them was done with passion and force. This force has propelled me to carry on with my writing until I found a medium to do so.

Me in 2007, during university. I kept a blog then.  

I wrote for the school paper in high school. In college, I eventually joined our university's public speaking organization. It was also during this time that blogging became a trend which never seemed to go away. I found myself writing about the everyday mundane happenings of my life on my blog.

Me today. Still journaling and now blogging again! 

When I started working, I still continued writing by occasionally contributing to newspapers and even producing our company newsletter at some point. Now that I am blogging again minus the angst and emo vibe of college, I am here in this course to develop that discipline and to hone my technique in a kind and forgiving setting. I am also integrating my output in this course to my #The100Days Project, which entails that I will be producing quality written work in the next 100 days. That is definitely more than enough time to build a habit for an already-habitual writer.

Day 7: Pray and Slay

Prayer has already become ingrained in my routine. I automatically say one of gratitude the minute I wake up. Having hypothyroidism along with a slew of other conditions growing up has made me really grateful to be alive each day. Even the fact that I can see clearly is already a reason for me to thank God. You see, I grew up with bad eyesight. My eye prescription peaked at 750 and my lenses were thick and heavy despite being already "ultrathin" (this was before geek chic became in fashion). Everything changed (really, clearer eyesight = clarity in my life) when my eyesight miraculously became 20/20 after a visit to Our Lady of Lourdes in France. I get my eyes checked annually and it is incredible to still have 20/20 vision after that miracle in 2001. Nowadays, I just wear non-prescription specs for fun (and to protect my eyes from gadget strain). But that miracle has truly moved me to pray, be thankful and well, #slay. 

One of my favorite prayers was by St. Francis. This was taken at St. Clare Monastery, a frequent hangout of mine in Quezon City. 

I do not think that you have to be religious or even believe in God to pray. All it takes is an honest faith in yourself and the ability to transcend your personal limitations and present condition. There are plenty of factors that you cannot control, but if you lift them up to a power greater than you will ever be, then you will also imbibe that power. I do recommend that you always practice thankfulness. Just be grateful for one thing each day until it becomes another, and another, and another. It will make you healthier, more balanced, and just a better person to be with since you appreciate how fine your life is   

DAY 6: Commuting Is Tough

This morning, I had to cross EDSA via three footbridges to reach the P2P bus station. The MRT was not working to its full capacity and the commuter buses were all crowded. Grab and Uber were cancelling my trips because my office is not the most accessible building there is. Hence, my decision to take the P2P was already the most viable option.  

The queue to the P2P was longer than usual.  

By the time I reached Megamall, I only had fifteen minutes to spare. My office was several blocks away, so I did not think twice anymore. I ran. 

I ran like my job depended on it (it was, as my employer puts a premium on punctuality). I ran without considering my disheveled appearance. I ran because time is more valuable than my comfort zone. I ran because I was escaping from mediocrity.  

I reached my workplace five minutes before the commencement of my shift. I walked to the chapel. It was time to give thanks.  

Day 5: Push Yourself

I woke up this morning feeling lazy. I was tempted to press the snooze button before I dragged my feet off the bed to change into my workout clothes and prepare for my fitness class. I can actually make it in time for my aerodance group. I was about to get inside my car when I asked our helper to take my picture. 

The picture was enough to inspire me workout. I'm a visual learner, so photos really speak to me. Seeing my abs has motivated me to push myself further. Just like that, my laziness has melted away. I rode my car and drove to my aerodance class.  

I had so much fun dancing and moving for an hour and a half. Sometimes, all I need is a picture to push myself even when there is a force pulling me back to bed. Note to self: the bed cannot give you abs! 

Day 4: Homestretch

I woke up at 6:10am today. That's already ten minutes too late for my aerodance workout. I initially felt bad because I needed that workout after a tiring week at work. I then did what always brings me back into perspective. I prayed. I thanked God that today is Saturday and that I have another day on earth. I thanked Him for the privilege of waking up and going through the motions of daylight and nighttime. I thanked Him for just letting me be.

I stood up from my bed and changed into workout clothes and shoes. 

I turned on my iPad and went on YouTube. I worked out.  

And I actually enjoyed it. 

Never mind if I did not wake up early for my group class. What matters most is that I got up and showed up to my workout for one. And I feel fulfilled as it is. 

Day 3: Friday, I'm in Love

In tennis, love means zero. In my life, love means going beyond respect. I respect my words and this entails fulfilling my dream of putting up my blog. After years of saving up for it, I finally bought a domain name and an annual subscription to a website-building service. This dream finally came true this week, as a result of hard work and a lot of courage from my Braver Goals course and #15DaysOfWritingTrue family.

Today's entry for my #15daysofwritingtrue Day 5 assignment

Having my own website does not end there. The real work has just begun and I'm determined to produce at least one blog entry a day. I am committed to doing so as I have commenced my own 100 Day Project, which means that I have to create something for the next 100 days. I chose writing as my main medium and since I also do creative journaling, I will throw that in the mix too. As long as I can write a blog entry each day, I'm honoring my promise to myself not just for the next 100 days, but for as long as I have words to say and thoughts to share.

It has been said that we should not ridicule other people's dreams, because we all have our own motivations to succeed in life. This website is mine. Like my domain name, it is my note to self to speakoutsam. 

I hope that that inspires you to also fulfill your own dream! 

Day 2: Joy in the Mundane

Today's writing assignment in my #15DaysOfWritingTrue class asked me to unplug for thirty minutes today. I have written more about my wandering along EDSA last night in my Day 4 assignment, but I also wanted to experience some quiet time even if I did not have the luxury of taking a walk outside as I have already logged into the office. Good thing I had my art journal and paints with me. I have decided to just let go and paint.

Thirty-minute art journal in response to my assignment for #15daysofwritingtrue

Having a conscious sense of being unplugged was wonderful. I ate my breakfast slowly, and sipped my coffee while reflecting on how bliss can be possible even in daily routine. It is in the ebb and flow of the hours and days that we can either be pushed to embark on challenges with bravery or be washed away by the current of stress and fatigue. Prior to taking my walk last night along EDSA and this morning's meaningful time-out, I was not aware that I was already experiencing burnout and fatigue from the daily commute, the summer heat, and everyday little things. This time of consciousness is much-needed because I realized that I am doing quite well after all and that it is in the mundane that I can be focused on my purpose in order to experience real joy every.single.day.

Pancit from Lunchboxdiet

My daily cuppa

I have just finished reading Socrates Cafe by Christopher Phillips and I would like to share with you my favorite passages. May this inspire you to carry on and never give up on your sense of wonder. 

I hope you find your life worth living.

My favorite paragraphs from Socrates Cafe by Christopher Phillips

Day 1

#galaxylatte ☕️ 

I found out about #The100DayProject from Camille Pilar, one of my teachers in the #15DaysOfWritingTrue e-course. Having a daily journaling challenge has motivated me to put up this blog and just write. So I have decided to embark on another daily writing trip for the next 100 days. 

I don't know what will happen in the next 100 days. All I know is that I will be sharing with you my thoughts and musings.

Right now I am inspired by this cup of Galaxy Latte which I enjoyed at Artesania, an artsy coffee shop along Maginhawa in Quezon City. I like how it tastes like my usual full-bodied brew, but it is so colorful you wouldn't even have guessed how intense it is. Same goes with myself. I want to be happy and presentable both in person and here online. However, I do not want to compromise on my identity and integrity. I will never give up on my right to wonder. Just like this galaxy latte, I will innovate (this blog being an example, as I only had the courage to put this up yesterday!) while being true to my core. I will be creative without deviating from my purpose. 

From my creative journal! 

How can you be creative for the next 100 days?